Um pouco de humor para começar bem o dia...

Q: Should I have a baby after 35?

A: No, 35 children is enough.



Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?

A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.



Q: How will I know if my vomiting is morning sickness or the flu?

A: If it's the flu, you'll get better.



Q: What is the most common pregnancy craving?

A: For men to be the ones who get pregnant.



Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?

A: Childbirth.



Q: The more pregnant I get, the more often strangers smile at me. Why?

A: 'Cause you're fatter than they are.



Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.

A: So what's your question?



Q: What's the difference between a nine-month pregnant woman and a model?

A: Nothing (if the pregnant woman's husband knows what's good for him).



Q: How long is the average woman in labor?

A: Whatever she says divided by two.



Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feet during labor, but pressure. Is she right?

A: Yes, in the same what that a tornado might be called an air current.



Q: When is the best time to have an epidural?

A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.



Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?

A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.



Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?

A: Yes, pregnancy.



Q: Does pregnancy cause hemorrhoids?

A: Pregnancy causes anything you want to blame it for.



Q: What does it mean when a baby is born with teeth?

A: It means that the baby's mother may want to rethink her plans to nurse.



Q: What is the best time to wean the baby from nursing?

A: When you see teeth marks.



Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?

A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.



Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?

A: When the kids are in college.



(enviado pela minha querida prima Rita, também estreante nestas lides de mãe-barriga) :o)